Tag: domestic abuse

Lucy Irving

by eileentroemel, posted in Author Interview

Lucy Irving and I met through a mutual friend. Her book in non-fiction and about abuse so please take care of yourself.

Tell us about yourself

I am Lucy and my entire life I’ve been a victim of abuse. Yet, I have always had a big personality and lots of strength. I am 38 yrs old and by the time I was 19 years old I had already had several cervical cancer cell procedures, abused child, a victim of domestic violence, and two of my three children that have passed away died. So by 19 I had endured more trauma than the average person. I lost myself more with the abuse from my husband because my first child passed away due to one of his attacks on me. The emotional pain was to much to handle and I fell into addiction and suffered an over dose on the anniversary of my second child’s first birthday/deathaversary. A near death experience gave me the strength to give my life back to God. Soon he answered my prayers and sent me an amazing husband after the last time my abusive husband almost killed me with a golf club. After four miscarriages and an extremely hard pregnancy I was blessed with an amazing miracle, a living son. Life was wonderful until I became pregnant with twins and miscarried one. Then one night I accidentally delivered my son alone in my bathroom and he was still-born. Because of the trauma I now live with ptsd, depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder. It took me a long time but I finally decided that I have the strength to keep going, and that there is joy and happiness in life no matter how much trauma a person might have to live with. I’m beyond honest, blunt and determined. And I refuse to ever give up. I am blessed and honored to be able to help other’s through the pain that I have been forced to live with.

When did you know you wanted to be an author?

My entire life I have loved to express myself with words. But when I realized how much my story was actually helping other’s I realized that I NEEDED to write.

What genres do you like to read?  Are these the same genres you write in?

I love any non fiction book and movie and yes, this is what I write in.

Is your book for adults, young adults or children?

My book is for adults and young adults. I also reach out to other’s about teen dv.

What is your current release or project?

My current book “My Cry to God” was self published but recently picked up by a traditional publisher and re edited and re launched.

Tell us about your key characters.

Main character is myself re named.

Please share a blurb

My Cry to God is the story of Lucy Irving, a young Christian woman who struggles to overcome many great obstacles in her life as she searches to find herself through her faith. The events in this book are based on the real life experiences of the author.From a young age, she deals with mental abuse from her whole family and physical abuse from her siblings. In her teenage years she is diagnosed with a life threatening disease that causes her to reevaluate her view of the world and her perspective on life. As she grows older, she finds herself drawn to men who at first provide her with a sense of safety and security, but ultimately end up making her feel even more broken than she had before, but she desperately wants to find love. All the while she questions her faith as she learns one lesson after another about the world and her purpose in it. Lucy yearns to become a mother, but she endures a number of heartbreaking miscarriages, as well as multiple stillbirths. In addition to suffering damage to her cervix in her youth, she is the target of her husband’s violent outbursts, which harm more than just Lucy herself. Her troubles in carrying a child to term eventually cause her to spiral into substance abuse, which alienates her even further from her already estranged family.Lucy deals with many difficult challenges in her life, including cancer, mental health issues, substance abuse, spousal abuse, difficulty having children, and many other issues. Though Lucy does not always feel as though God is by her side, as many of her struggles in life lead her to question whether God loves everyone equally. She especially has a hard time believing that God cares about her to the extent that he cares about others in the world, as she deals with a great amount of pain and tragedy during her lifetime. After decades of soul-searching, she ultimately comes to a decision about the role God plays in her life and the path she wants to take.

Do you have a favorite scene?

My husband tells me “I’m not marrying you for a baby, i’m marrying you for you”

Many people tell me this is their favorite scene also.

What advice would you give a beginner?

My advice to beginners would be “always follow your heart and never give up on your dreams”

Amazon link: https://l.facebook.com/l.php?u=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2Fdp%2F1733794697%2Fref%3Dcm_sw_r_cp_awdb_t1_oo22Db30W9H5D%3Ffbclid%3DIwAR38PbF4hs7ZkdKWERbSdD9iEAQv62v3cDojMXKc4cMTckC0OGIhkdH_OFo&h=AT1R6ti0iliw69C5DXN2o76kEwmeAoR6ID20ROhfGCKzV1v63UAHYKY6u1WMaUl-cSLJTpdQxPhE_8c1h8Tl6wbho0j0WwbL_6E7PnrvC0GVRy2s6LQifbVdLks9VbWLIuEMeaoGBdSaO3O-wRAslg

Facebook Author Page: https://www.facebook.com/authorlucyirving/

Instagram: lucyirvingauthor

Domestic Abuse is a Serious Crime

by eileentroemel, posted in Life

While driving home last night after a long day, I spoke with my middle daughter.  She told me about one of her co-workers.  This woman was abused by her boyfriend resulting in him being arrested and put in jail. 

She has left him, taking her three sons with her.  They went through a trial.  Even though the man has a long history of domestic abuse the only reason the judge put him in jail was because she wrote a letter.  She has a no-contact order. 

Now he is in jail.  However, she gets “love” notes from him.  The police aren’t taking them seriously.  She says this is how he used to talk to her when he beat her.  She wants the police to put a stop to it, you would think no contact means no freaking contact but apparently if you talk nice in your contact it is okay. 

I was irate, disappointed, and disgusted by the response.  Now I heard this third hand so I could be wrong but I want to call the police department in her town and say “What the F**K?” 

I talked about this in a private message to a friend on facebook – she said when her first husband beat her – back before women’s shelters and such – the police gave her a pamphlet on how to be a better wife. 

I think my head exploded.  Is it any wonder women wanting to get married is on the decline?  I know there are good men in the world.  I’ve been fortunate enough to have relationships with several of them from my father, husband, brothers-in-law and co-workers.  If I tell this story to them, they will be as appalled as I am. 

My question is – when does the rest of the world get it?  When do we stop blaming the victim?  When do we make it known that hitting someone else – loved one or not – is WRONG.  In the case of my daughter’s friend – her boyfriend has threatened to kill her and her three kids.  If the police do nothing to stop the “good” contact when there is a NO freaking contact order, what happens when he gets out of jail and can lay hands on her and her sons. 

It is time for women to say NO MORE.  No more rape, no more abuse, no more crap from anyone.  Stop worrying about being called a bitch and stand up for yourself and for other women.  We need to get tougher on crimes against women and stop with the attitude that boys will be boys.  Boys are supposed to grow up to be men and men – real men – don’t do this crap.

I don’t hate men.  I know there are going to be some out there who say – she’s a man hater.  I good man – like a good woman – is a gem.  I have one.  I know.  He’s never raised his hand to me.  He stands with me, supports me, and loves me.  He’s a real man and the best kind.  It’s time we taught our boys to be men – real men who respect and honor the women in their lives.