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I must be crazy.  I worked on 50 pages last night, reading and editing.  I got through it all and went to bed at a reasonable hour (for me anyways).  I lay in bed and thought – that whole scene needs reworking.  Over and over in my mind it rumbled and  I knew it had to be redone.  For 15 minutes I lay there thinking about how it should be rearranged – the pieces were mostly good but they were in the wrong order. 

After a weekend of editing, rewriting, and reviewing, I’ve managed to get about 100 pages edited.  I’m not surprised because I made some pretty big changes to the beginning of the novel.  Now it’s going quicker but I know there are several sections coming up that I’ll be making more big changes to.  Hopefully one more weekend of editing (or maybe several long nights) and I’ll have it done.  Then I have to get the edits into the computer and investigate more on publishing it on Kindle. 

I’ve not read this novel in over five or six years.  I’ve tried to market and sell it but it has been no go.  In re-reading it, I think it is a good story.  It moves along at a good pace.  It keeps the reader involved – at least I think so. 

The changes I’ve made this weekend were definitely needed.  They make the story more believable and realistic.  Revisiting it like this has helped me be objective and see the changes needed to update the story and improve the entire manuscript.  It isn’t a matter of putting commas in the right place or fixing the typographical errors but of refining the story.  It is work – a lot of it – but I’m glad I’m doing it.

It is hard to be objective about my own work.  I read it and I see the flaws.  I’m also my own toughest critic.  But in reading this again, I find a good story.  I’m pleased with my work and how it’s turned out.  This was my first full length novel and I think I did a good job.  Now I have to see if others agree…

For about ten years now I’ve had a romance novel that I submit to different publishers.  I’ve never sold it unfortunately.  I had somewhat given up on selling it. 

Recently I decided that I needed to revisit this manuscript.  I am going to edit and revise it.  It’s been a long while since I’ve read it so it will be interesting to see how this goes.  It is nearly 300 typed double spaced pages long and over 100,000 words. 

What motivated this sudden interest in this manuscript again?  Well my youngest daughter, Stephanie emailed me a link to the publishing guidelines for Kindle. (http://www.amazon.com/gp/feature.html/ref=amb_link_352814142_14?ie=UTF8&docId=1000234621&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=left-1&pf_rd_r=039VVXERM92NS9FNV14H&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=1276313662&pf_rd_i=133141011) The small bit that I’ve read seems like a good idea so I am going to edit this book and see if I can get it published there.  I might also try to put together a couple of poetry books to see how they do as well.  It can’t hurt and maybe there will be a demand for my work.  If that happens then it might help to move my other manuscripts forward with either traditional publishers or more on Kindle or even other self publishing opportunities.

The day is rainy. I’ve been cleaning my desk and doing all sorts of different things for writing and the house.  I have at least made organized piles.  I will at some point need to go through those piles and deal with the items in them – some sooner rather than later. 

This is all part of my prep for getting ready to write.  It may sound strange but it helps me organize my thoughts and gives me a chance to clear out the clutter quite literally as well as a bit figuratively.

Today I’m hoping to get through a complete edit of this manuscript but I’m sure that the others in the household will have impact on my progress.  Ken and Vicki are both under the weather.  Now if I could just get the two of them to sleep and leave me alone I’m sure I could get more done….

Since I’ve been up for nearly two hours now, I should stop putzing around and dig in….

I’m halfway through the second week on the new job.  It has been exhausting and exhilarating all at once.  I’ve been tired for the last two weeks but I’m also learning a lot. 

The difference in the atmospheres and environment is very interesting.  The DOT was sort of casual for dress and in some ways for the working environment.  There was a lot of stress but we also knew how to blow off some of that stress too.

The university is definitely dressier and a bit more formal.  I think the people are a lot more understanding.  I’ve worked with a lot of men over the years – a lot of engineers.  Now I’m working with mostly women.  I think I like it.  They kind of do their thing and I do mine.  There isn’t a lot of interference and there is a lot of respect for my knowledge and ability.

I got a great compliment from my boss today.  She said she couldn’t understand why she was getting so much done.  She had cleared so much off her desk and had been very productive.  Then she came to my office and saw that I’d also been very productive.  Piles that had been cluttering up the office had been cleaned up, dealt with, and put away.  I still have a few little piles but mostly I’ve gotten the piles on the surfaces cleared up. 

I have not conquered this job.  I’ve removed some of the backlog of work and learned one or two aspects of the job.  There a lot more layers to learn and adjust to.  I’m looking forward to the challenge of them. 

Another bonus… I’ve started going to the pool nightly.  I started last night and went again tonight.  It is heaven to end my day sitting in the hot tub.  I de-stress a lot and the aches in my bones go away.  I come home in a better mood because I’m not in pain or on drugs.

I’m still exhausted.  I’m still waking up at 4:30 (wish that would stop already).  I am thrilled that I went eight workdays without filling my gas tank.  I used to put two tanks of gas in my car a week.  I’ve gone a week and a half on one tank.  That is an exciting savings.

This is a good move…

Obviously politics is a hot topic and on every one’s  mind.  I’m not going to get into a debate on who is the better candidate or whatever.. I think we all know that the decision when we go to the polls is generally  a matter of who will do the least damage (though there are a few good candidates).

Christine O’Donnell from Delaware I think is a tea party candidate and has been sticking her foot in her mouth.  Like Palin she makes women look bad.  The latest hoopla is concerning the first amendment. 

I’ll be the first to admit I don’t know the amendments or their exact wording.  I’m also not a candidate for a public office.  But I do know google.  I know that if I go to google I can find a reputable source that will give me some information on almost any topic. 

I don’t know what O’Donnell said as I didn’t hear it but what I heard was that she was questioning whether the constitution actually says separation of church and state.  She apparently sees nothing wrong with mixing the two. 

If you are like me you want to go to the source and see what the constitution actually says.  So here it is from a fairly reputable source:”

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”
http://www.usconstitution.net/const.html#Am1

Now what people need to realize is that this was an amendment tapped on to the constitution in 1791 (that is from that site too).  Since 1791 we have had laws and other legal documents that have refined, updated, and clarified these amendments (and the constitution).  If my math is right that is 219 years of modification.  But one thing I think O’Donnell needs to do is read the original content.  It says clearly that Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion.  That is the opening phrase. 

She seems to want Christianity to be the state religion.  Well not everyone in the US is Christian.  So what does she propose?  For a month we all be Christian.  Then the next month we can all be Buddhists or Pagan or Muslim. Or if we are all going to be Christian, then which Christian?  Baptist, Catholic, Methodist, Lutheran? 

The point of this amendment is so that people will be able to choose what they want to believe and the government can’t dictate those beliefs and ideas.  This is my opinion and I’m not a constitutional scholar or anything.  Historically I believe (if I remember my history lessons right) that one of the biggest reasons that people came to this country was to escape the religious oppression that they were enduring in England and Europe.  We fought a war to be free from those beliefs.  It was in my history book.  There was a pretty big section on it – it was called the Revolutionary War.  Do we really want to go back a point where people can be persecuted, prosecuted, and demoralized for their ideas and beliefs?  People need to study history in order to understand the mistakes made and and learn from them.

Is it November 3rd yet?  I can’t wait for the idiocy to be done.  Of course then we have to see what sort of idiocy the American public opted to do… it is one insane cycle….

I spent a very lazy day yesterday reading and lounging in front of the fireplace.  It was a spectacular day which I enjoyed no end.  It was very energizing.  The books I read were Dragon in the Driveway (young adult book), Libraries of Ancient Times, and Lady Knight.  The libraries one is a non-fiction and I read a chapter or so in it.  The other two were fiction and exceedingly enjoyable.  I laughed and cried with the books.

The other day at work I listened as a woman explained she could not read books because of her learning disability.  This is such sadness.  I think of all the books I have and read.  I would be lost without my books. 

I was reading Lady Knight last night and forced myself to put the book down because it was 11:30 and I had to work today.  I only had another 120 pages but I wanted to thoroughly enjoy the ending of this book.  I finished it off tonight and did just that.

Reading takes me away from everything.  If done right it can make me laugh, cry, and ache for the characters to win through to their goal.  It doesn’t really matter the genre if it is well written it can move me.  For those who don’t get to read or won’t read – I feel sad that they don’t know the pleasure I know in reading.

Tonight I’ve finished Lady Knight and there are two more lovely fictional books to read but I’ll be good and go to bed.  I’ve got my book on ancient libraries to read during lunch tomorrow.  I’m almost done with that book.  Then I have the Gerda Lerner book on the Creation of Patriarchy.  The non-fiction books make me think.  They don’t necessarily transport me to a different time and place (well that depends) but they make me think about the topics covered.  I think this is why it takes me so long to read them – I need time to digest all that I take in.

I realized today as I was packing up at work and thinking about reading tonight that I was actually still reading three books – the two non-fiction and the one fiction.  Now I’m down to two and thinking I need more.  I must be sick or something….

It greatly disturbs me that we, as a society, seem to be leaning towards a more homogeneous society.  If we aren’t all worshiping the same god or behaving the same way then those who don’t are the enemy.  This country in particular was founded on the differences we have.  We wanted to be able to believe differently.  People fled the sameness in Europe and Britain to come here for religious freedom.  It didn’t matter what the beliefs were, here people were free to believe as they chose to. 

Now, however, that isn’t the case.  We (again as a society) seem to expect everyone to think alike and behave alike.  Women behave a particular way – they must like shopping and fashion.  Men must behave a particular way too – they  must like sports and so on. 

The sad thing about this homogeny is that it removes any chances for stellar people to stand out.  Where would we be if Henry Ford had become a Buggy builder instead of innovating the car?  Or where would we be if Thomas Edison hadn’t created the light bulb? 

These people thought outside the box and believed they were capable of creating something better.  The religious and spiritual beliefs are the same.  If you look at the core beliefs of most religions you will find similar concepts.  Muslims, Buddhists, Christians, and Pagans all essentially have the same core beliefs.  Yet this seems to be a point of contention in our world.  We go back to the idea that all must believe the way I do (and you fill in the religion) or you are evil.  When will we outgrow this hateful and hurtful idea?

Most people know my mom is Methodist and my husband is Lutheran.  I took my daughters to the Methodist church so they would have an understanding of what organized religion was.  All the while I sat in church I hated it.  These are not my beliefs. 

Some who know me, know that I have chosen a different path.  Most who know me haven’t a clue what my beliefs are.  I’ve guarded them.  I have told myself that it is because I don’t want to embarrass or cause problems for my husband or my daughters.  I’ve skirted the issue many times in order to have some sense of normalness in life. 

These are the lies I’ve told myself.  In reality, I didn’t want to face being different.  I’ve been different all my life and it is tiresome to always go against the flow.  If I’m going to tout tolerance for different beliefs then I need to be brave enough to stand up and say – I have different beliefs.  I am not a Christian like my mother or husband.  I am an eclectic witch who is seeking. 

Take a deep breath everyone – yes I used the witch word and it isn’t a euphemism for bitch.  Before anyone jumps to conclusions here are my general beliefs.  I believe in a divine being.  I don’t believe it is male or female.  I believe that it appears to people in those forms because we understand them but in reality the divine force is everything from the animals, plants, people, and even the earth itself.  It is everything and everywhere. 

I believe your actions and choices determine the type of life you have.  I believe in karma but again I think it is much more complicated than the simple you did bad so something bad will happen to you or you did good so something good will happen to you.  Life is a bunch of checks and balances.  Our choices determine what checks and balances happen to us.

Let me also state that while I may have these alternative beliefs from most people in society, I still go to work and pay my bills.  I don’t sacrifice animals or children.  I don’t worship a devil (don’t believe in one).  I’m not having sex with goats or other farm animals.  These are all misconceptions about the Pagan beliefs.

I came to my beliefs later in life.  My sister Teri introduced me to some of the ideas and I’ve taught myself the rest in discovering who I am.  I am grateful Ken and the girls accepted my growth in this area. 

When I say we need to have tolerance for different beliefs and lifestyles I am not asking you to accept some strange far out beliefs.  I’m asking you to accept and understand me.

Went to see the movie Red today.  There was no redeeming qualities in this movie other than it made me laugh and I enjoyed the blowing up of things.  Bruce Willis, Morgan Freeman, Mary Louise Parker… all did a great job in the movie.  It won’t get any awards for being a classic but it was a good blow up action with a quirky humor movie. 

Fortunately the movie was in regular film and not the horrid 3D.  I know that is the latest craze but whenever I watch a 3D movie it gives me a headache.  When we went to the Milwaukee museum we went to a 3D movie and ended up leaving because it was bothering me so much. 

On top of which there are studies that show it isn’t good for the development of childrens brains to view things in 3D.  Most people I talk to don’t like them.  My daughter tells me that most comments on news stories about 3D indicate that people do not like the 3D. 

Another downside for the 3D is it costs more to go to these movies.  It can cost up to $3 more (and higher in the bigger cities) to go to a 3D  movie rather than a regular one.  I know my funds are already stretched in order for us to afford a trip to the theater and if my choice is between a movie at regular price (which is too expensive) and one that costs any amount more… I’m taking the less expensive one.

Why is it then that movie makers are jumping on the band wagon to do everything in 3D?  I don’t get this – one rule of marketing is to know your targetted market.  If the targeted market is not into the 3D affects then why continue to do it? 

It appears from the one article I saw on it that after Avatar the 3D craze started to fizzle out.  So if this is truly the case why are so many movies still coming out in 3D?  I want to say to movie makers to get a clue…