Bad Sleep

Ken got the shopping done early this morning.  With my list, coupons, sales flyer shopping and rebates, he saved over $20!  This is about 20% of what he spent.

Last night I made a list of what I wanted to get done today.  I meant to get up early, get to work, and keep at it as long as possible.  I didn’t count on a bad night’s sleep.  I got up this morning – woken up by one of the daughters.  After talking to her, I did the rebates for the shopping.  Then I proceeded to do nothing more strenuous than play a couple of games on my phone.  I’m up and moving again.  After I’m done on the computer, I’ll head back to the kitchen to do some food prep for the week.

If I find any energy, I’ll go back to the craft room and work on organizing.  I have a few things Ken needs to carry out and put elsewhere – mostly empty rubbermaid containers.  There is some stuff which is going in a box to our daughters in Atlanta.  If my energy level stays, I’m hoping to make more of a dent in that room today.

Last night I worked on a skirt for a friend.  I LOVE how it is turning out.  I made the waistband using broomstick lace technique.  Then it’s a simple hdc for the rest but with a vertical stripe – which means I have seven strands of yarn hanging down.  This slows me down a bit but it is still coming along nicely. As I’m working, I’m writing the pattern.  I’m trying to write it in such a way it doesn’t need sizing.  However, I’ll have to see how successful I am at this.  I’ve never written a pattern for clothing before – one of the reasons is I don’t like to size things.

New experiences are good even if they are a little scary.  I’ll keep pushing forward and hope it works out.  Once I’m done with this size, I may have to try the pattern on a larger size to see if it works for the plus size person.

Unfortunately, with the bad night’s sleep I just want a nap but Sundays are a bad day to nap because I have to go back to work tomorrow.  I’ll have to find my energy and work on things which keep me moving forward and awake.  Hopefully that means I accomplish a lot but only time will tell on this.

Rested but Tired

When I have dizziness, nausea, and headaches from lack of sleep, I know I’m reaching my limit.  Yesterday all of those were hammering my body pretty bad.  Still I closed my eyes and couldn’t settle to sleep. 
Instead of writing last night I watched tv.  I’ve not watched tv except for an hour with Ken in the evenings in several weeks.  Two episodes of Rizzoli and Isles and my eyes were drooping and it seemed like I was likely to sleep.  The tv went off and I closed my eyes. 
An hour later, I turned the light back and grabbed my computer.  My mind wouldn’t shut down yet again.  It isn’t that I’m lying there thinking about the story I’m working on.  I have all sorts of other things going through my head that just won’t stop as well as listening to my head pounding and having a stitch in my side because my asthma is bugging me because I’ve had no sleep. 
I wrote.  I finished two scenes one of which was a battle from a different perspective.  I’ll probably be adding more into that so it is more involved when I do the edits (or if I go back today).  As I reached the end of the fight and flee scene my eyes were the only thing bugging me. 
Before starting the next scene, I decided I’d try sleeping again.  Ken woke me up around 2:30 to ask me something.  To be fair, I think he thought I was awake.  I thought great, now I’ll be up for a while.  However, I finally got back to sleep and when my alarm went off I was deeply asleep.  I opted to turn it off and not go to work so I could catch up on some sleep.
I slept solidly for a while and then dozed for a couple of hours allowing myself to slowly wake up and acclimate to the world.  It felt good to actually sleep.  I still have a headache but that is normal after so long without sleep I think. 

My body finally overruled my brain.  Now the test will be to see if I can sleep reasonably tonight.  I have a few things to do at home but I’m going to work on writing my story.  It is pulling me – even above my other writing tasks.  While I’ve got the momentum, I’d love to finish a rough draft.  Then it can also go in the to-do pile.  

Must Type Faster

Sleep didn’t work last night.  I tried twice to go to sleep before I gave up and wrote.  Just before 1:00 am, I turned the light off to try sleeping a third time.  I finally got to sleep but was awake again at 4.  This sucks.

On the up side, I worked on my story last night.  I finished off the scene I was writing and started another.  I have seven scenes in my head that I think will flow and move the plot forward nicely.  I’m up over 20,000 words in three days. 

I’m in love with my two main characters.  I’m not sure where they are taking me quite yet.  I have glimpses of what will happen to them but these come to me as I’m moving through one scene and into the next. 

The change in mind frame for me when I’m writing is amazing.  I write and even when I’m frustrated with not finding the right words or not describing the scene the way I want everything else fades away.  The headache I’ve had for three days, the aches, the pain I deal with daily, all fade away.  It annoys me when I’m interrupted by anything. 

Not only am I narrowing my vision to the screen I’m looking at but I’m going to a different place in my head than the crazy repetitive place that won’t stop when I try to sleep.  My focus is so narrow, the music I play often fades away.  Although sometimes I hear the same song and then I get annoyed.  Never mind that hours have passed since I heard it the first time. 

One of my biggest problems is I can’t seem to type fast enough.  I’ll find myself reading over what I wrote and will have missed words.  It is a rough draft but it has to be comprehensive enough to edit when I finish the first draft.  I type fairly fast but the words are tumbling out of my fingers so fast I’m skipping words.  This will make the editing process fun. 

If you want to read some of my writing, my books are on sale at smashwords.com – 25% off till the end of July. 

Sleep isn’t Necessary – Right?

I tried really hard to be good and go to sleep early last night.  I lay in the dark trying to shut down my mind but it just didn’t work. 

My niece rescued me from tossing and turning for hours by calling.  After I talked to her, I knew it was hopeless to try to sleep so I worked on a story.  I went from 7600 words to 15000.  I also know the next three or four steps in the story.

At 11:00 I tried to go to sleep but only slept for an hour and then I was awake again.  The rest of the night was hit or miss with only one long stretch of about an hour and a half sleeping. 

Plan for tonight – not even try sleeping until I’ve written for several hours.  I’m not turning my computer off until I can’t see the screen anymore.  Maybe then I’ll get a stretch of sleep longer than an hour or so. 

On the plus side, the story I’ve been writing is developing nicely.  The characters are becoming stronger, secondary characters are falling into place, and the plot is coming along.  I have the next three or four scenes planned out in my head; I just have to get them down on paper. 

I’m also losing large chunks of time in the evenings with writing.  I look at the clock in the early evening and the next time I look it is several hours later.  The only disturbance is when someone calls or texts me or when I get annoyed with the music I’m listening to and decide it is time for quiet in the house. 

Insomnia

For the last week or so, I’ve not been sleeping well or long.  This is just part of the cycle I go through so I’m not unused to it.  There are actually some benefits to not sleeping. 

Obviously, I’ve been reading more and enjoying the stories.  It is great to fall into a book and get lost in the characters and plot.  It helps to pass the time when I can’t sleep in a good way.  It doesn’t lessen the tiredness but at least makes the inability to sleep pleasant.

I started the last book in the series I’m reading and struggled with the beginning.  It is very dark and I hope the author will lighten it up but it went to a place I struggled to read through.  I will go back to it when my mood changes. 

Instead of reading last night, I started a story.  It has been drifting in my head for a few days and I thought it would go away but it took root and wouldn’t let go.  I started writing after Ken went to bed about seven.  I pulled out my netbook and flashdrive, opened Word and just started typing. 

I had no hesitation – well except when I had to come up with names.  There are times I would just like it to be him or her.  I typed and the story fell onto the page.  Except for the occassional drink of water, I created the story.  At 11:00 I got a cramp in my hands.  That was a first for me.  But I realized I’d been typing for four hours with little interruption. 

To be honest, I was a little annoyed with both the cramp and the time.  I had only a short start to the story out of my head and had so much more I wanted to get down.  Normally when I see it is so late, I’ll start thinking about wrapping up what I’m doing – not last night.  I dove right back into telling the story. 

By 12:00 I realized I had to quit in order to get up for work.  I tried to finish up a scene but the next scene came to mind.  I just wanted to keep going with the story.  I forced myself to stop at 12:40. 

Normally, I’m so tired after a marathon writing like this that I fall almost immediately asleep.  This didn’t happen.  I think it was after 2:40 before I finally fell asleep.  My alarm was set for 5:00 so this would have given me less than 3 hours of sleep.  I’ll generally hit my snooze for an hour so that would have given me about four hours of sleep which is usually enough to get me through. 

Unfortunately at 4:55 my eyes popped open and I realized I was awake for the morning.  I hoped and reset my alarm to 6:00 and tried to go back to sleep.  It didn’t work.  I just tossed and turned more. 

It will be a long day with a day-long headache as part of the mix.  I won’t bother trying to go to sleep early tonight because it won’t work.  I’ll probably just work on my story. 

The best thing is – I got 7600 words into my story.  I’ll have to start a spreadsheet on this as I’ve got details I want to keep track of and I feel like this could be more detailed as I go forward. 

I don’t know if I’ll sleep tonight.  It is hit or miss at this stage but if I don’t I’ll probably work on the story to see how much further I can get with it.

As a reminder – my books are on sale on Smashwords.com – 25% off .. it is a great deal.  Check them out at https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/kevvs229

Empty My Head of Words

It was good to go back to work.  I got caught up on a lot of things.  I also couldn’t stay the whole day as my foot was too sore.

Driving home was an adventure.  I did okay so long as I didn’t have to brake too much.  Hopefully it will be a bit better tomorrow.

Tonight I was hoping to just drop off to sleep but that wasn’t to be.  I watched a tv show and then read a book.  When those two things didn’t work I played on the Kindle Fire – backgammon, scrabble and skipbo.  Still I can’t sleep.

Insomnia and I are old friends.  Tonight my mind just won’t stop rambling around to different topics from the writing tasks I need to work on to crocheting I want to get done to so many other topics.  Apparently there is no off switch to my brain.

If I thought getting up and working on something would help I would totally do that but I know it won’t.  I just need to settle my mind and center my energy to balance out the chaos in my head.  Once I do that I’ll have the peace I need to drift off to sleep.

I’ve taken Tylenol to help the gout and I’m writing this blog to help empty my head of words… I can only try these things to see if they actually help.  I know the words will pile in again but maybe by writing this small bit they will give me enough peace so I can sleep.

If none of this makes sense – blame it on the insomnia…

Insomnia Strikes Again

Last night I was a responsible adult and went to bed around 11 pm.  This is good for me as I like the night and would stay up till 2 or 3 am if I didn’t have to be on the job at 7:45 am.  However, last night I should have just stayed up.  I didn’t sleep a wink.  I spent the night trying to sleep.  I got up once when Ken got up and went back to bed thinking I might be able to sleep as I was so tired.
Sadly, that didn’t happen.  I heard everything he did.  Every noise annoyed me and kept me awake.  Totally not his fault as he is normally very quiet in the morning.  At 5:30 my alarm went off and I debated staying home.  I hit the snooze as is my habit.  I thought I’ll see how I feel in nine minutes.  I hit it until 6:30 when I realized that even if I stayed home I wasn’t going to be able to sleep. 
The bad part is the lack of sleep cascades into so many other issues.  My pain level goes up.  My allergies (with the lovely humidity we are having) are overreacting to the weather, as is my asthma.
The funny thing is you would think I would be grumpy.  On a level I am but at this point I’m just well tired.  I’m sure I’ll go through the silly and giddy stage and drop into the crabby as all get out stage (that is the worst).  Once I reach this stage it is best for me to isolate myself (sleep is good but not always attainable).

To sleep or not…

Last night I finished a chapter about ten and thought okay I’m done writing but I’m not tired enough to go to sleep.  I grabbed the book I was reading and curled up in my recliner.  Three hours later I finish the book and decide okay it would be best to go to bed. 

I lay there in bed waiting for sleep to overcome me.  I’ve been awake a long time afterall and I should be able to drop off right?  I mean I had a full day yesterday.  I wrote for a while, did Vicki’s taxes, talked to Gin and Stephanie, watched tv, hung out with Ken, finished reading a book.  I should be tired right? 

Nope.  I lay in bed with my eyes closed.  I shifted positions trying to find a comfortable position and about the time I would start to drift off then the next scene in my manuscript started to play.  The good thing about this is that I’ll be able to write it fairly easily because it is in my head what will happen and how. 

I wanted to be up early so I could spend the whole day with Ken.  It’s his birthday and I wanted to be up early so we could sit and talk or watch a movie or whatever.  Nope – I finally fell asleep about 4 am and slept late. 

I appreciate the inspiration I’m getting to write this epic manuscript but at some point I would really like to sleep normally.  As a writer I may have to give up that desire because I have the feeling my muse is going to be as inconvenient as my guides…

Time Thief

There is a thief in my area.  He or she has been stealing time from me.  I’ll be working away at something – either at work or at home – and suddenly it is much later than I thought it was.  The other night is a perfect example.  Ken started the dishwasher before he went to bed around 7ish.  He told me about it and asked that I turn it off etc when it was done.  I think I grunted acknowledgement at him (hey I was writing).  Five minutes – no more I swear – the chime indicating the dishwasher was done went off.  I was annoyed.  It must be broke or something right?  No it was 8:20 and the time thief had struck again.
He was hiding in my house last night because after I took care of the dishwasher and only maybe ten minutes later, Vicki came to tell me she was going to bed.  I told her it was very early for her to go to bed. She pointed out to me that it was nearly 10 pm.  I cursed the time thief again.  He’d struck while I’d been busy writing a chapter…
Two minutes later – I swear that was it – she wanders down the hall all squinty and grumbly because she can’t sleep.  I start to tell her she needs to give herself more than two minutes and realize I’ve been hit again by the time thief because it is nearly 11.  Of course I wrote nearly an entire chapter of almost 4600 words last night.  It flowed and practically wrote itself.  I am very pleased with it. 
I was a good girl then and went to bed.  Unfortunately sleep was elusive and I tossed and turned nearly all night only falling asleep after 2:45 this morning.  Now if I could only get the damn time thief to give me back that time – I could have a nap and not be completely exhausted today….