Tag: stress

Unexpected Day Off

by eileentroemel, posted in Crochet and crafting, Life

Registration is done at work which means the stress level has reduced.  My house is still a mess and the next two weekends are full of activities.  We’ll do the activities – paint nite this weekend and an author’s event next weekend.  We need the down time to reduce our stress.

Ken leaves for Georgia in May.  This leaves Vicki and I hanging out on our own.  I’ve got a few days off during the time he’s gone.  My goal is to get some publishing, writing, and crocheting done during my time off.  However, I also have some household things I want to get done.

This week has been crazy for me.  I had an allergy test done on Monday.  They washed my arms with alcohol which immediately started them itching.  Their solution was to wash them with soap and water.  I let them, though most soaps bother me.  Fortunately, this one didn’t.  I didn’t really find out anything new.  I already knew I was allergic to the things they told me but these were more specific results.

Tuesday I left work early to see my regular doctor.  He gave me my results for my MRI.  There wasn’t anything to stress about – thankfully.

Today I am off to the dietician.  I’ve been seeing her for few months.  I like her and she has good suggestions for helping me balance out life and food.  I doubt I’ve lost weight.  It’s been a crazy few months with lots of eating fast food while we moved Vicki and a lot of stress eating.  However, I’ve managed to stop eating out as much which is good for my checkbook and good for my body.

The elevator at work isn’t working.  I spent yesterday at work but not in my office.  It made it difficult for me to be involved but the floor was quiet according to my student workers.  Today I’m hoping it will be even more quiet.  However, the elevator is going to be down for the first part of next week.  That will make it difficult on me and a number of my faculty.  These are the joys of working in an old building.

I’m working on two graduation gifts.  I’m creating new patterns for most of the gifts so this means new patterns to publish.  The first scarf I made turned out really well.  I like the design, color, length, and feel of it.  Now I need to take pictures so I can publish the pattern.  I started a second one last night and I’m hoping to finish it today.

This morning I’m spending a little time on the computer but hope to go back to crocheting shortly.  It seems like there’s always so much for me to do with a day off and so little time to get it all done.  I have to remember to keep the to do list to a reasonable length and focus on one task at a time.  Part of me wants to get a bunch of stuff done but I’m waiting on things from other people to be able to do those things.  This means I need to pick something completely in my control and work on it.  Today, it will be crocheting and watching movies.  For a couple of reasons, one – it will lower my stress level, and two – it will get things done I need to get done which has a definite deadline.

Considering I have the day off, I was up very early.  I did go back to sleep but was still up by 7.  Ava does not know what to do with me.  She came and cuddled – yup the cat who hates me – with me for a bit.  Sasha always is looking for attention from me but Ava rarely asked for attention.

It’s time to hit the recliner, find a movie and go back to crocheting.  Maybe with luck, I’ll finish another scarf and start a third.. fingers crossed.

Crochet Savior!

by eileentroemel, posted in Crochet and crafting, Life

My middle daughter moved home.  March was chaotic with her moving.  April is turning into chaos with getting our house organized – or reorganized and integrating her stuff into our house.

I’m finally tackling my office.  Currently it’s in that state of extreme messy because I’ve been going through papers, shelves, drawers in order to sort out what we need to keep.  There’s an ultimate goal in mind but for now, I want to get rid of one piece of furniture and move two others.  These means I’m taking decorations down from the wall as the furniture is going to cover up the wall space.

I’m not certain the way I want to rearrange the furniture is actually going to work so I need to try it before I decide whether it is how I actually want it.  Also all the stuff I want to put on the furniture is sitting around my office making it seem more cluttered.  I swear there is an organized method to the chaos at this point.

I started yesterday and made good progress but today I’ve spent running errands and prepping for the week.  There are some things I don’t want to get rid of.  I look at them and the organizer in me is saying just let it go.  But the writer / mom / creator in me is saying NO!!!  I’m working on it.  I’m also looking at a row of books – reference type – which sit by computer.  Do I want to weed through them?  No but should I?  Probably.  I know some of them will stay.  I can look at at least six of them and know they stay but there’s at least three times that many.  So reluctantly I’ll look through these books to weed out any.

Then there’s the recycle / garbage, sale piles to contend with.  I’ve got a box of stuff for a sale we’re hoping to participate in later this summer.  Also while I remove and rearrange what do I do with all the stuff.

It’s definitely been a weekend of chaos.  I’m not sure we’re making it any better.  However, at the intermediate phase, it is so chaotic I’m not sure it’s getting better.

We’re doing all of this while I’m at my most busy at work.  Registration and scheduling for spring 18 are going on.  Lots of changes, problem solving, and stress at work means I need peace at home.  Right now, no peace just chaos.

This is where my crocheting comes in.  I’ve been working on a number of projects.  I finished an afghan, several headbands, and started a bandana.  This keeps me sane (ish) as it takes me away from the stress of both work and home.  It allows me to escape into my creative mind and work on patterns.  Right now I have several which I want to publish.

I keep telling myself it will get better.  I keep reminding myself it is the first weeks and I need to be patient.  However, the clutter is starting to wear on my nerves.  After I’m done in the office, I plan to hit the recliner and work on another pattern or three in order to calm and ease the stress of life right now.

I Survived…

by eileentroemel, posted in Crochet and crafting, Life, Writing

I survived the first week of faculty being back and a crazy schedule of meetings including two all day meetings.  It was good to see everyone back and to have a bit of a buzz and energy in our department.  However, I’m worn out from the hectic pace and high demand.

Refilling my tank this weekend is going to involve rest, sleep (if I can) and crocheting.  I’m in the mood to crochet.  So long as my arm doesn’t get too sore, I think I’ll work on projects.  I have a few going and a few I want to get done.  I like quick projects as they allow me to feel like I’m accomplishing things.

I’ve been making baskets and I want to try a couple more different things for patterns.  Then I will put them together into a group of patterns.  It has been fun to try out different techniques and see how they work.

There is a strange thing happening this weekend – I have no plans.  I know there are things I should or could be doing but at this point, I have NO plans.

I wrote last night for a bit.  It felt good to get a short story out of my head which had been bouncing around in there.  I worked on Wayfarer 11 for a bit but couldn’t settle into it and switched to the other story.  My intent was to just get the opening down as that was pounding at me.  Instead, I wrote the whole story before crashing for the night.  That’s just how it works sometimes.

Today I’m going to be lazy, keep my legs warm in the damp weather, and crochet.  If I make new patterns great.  If I fall back on old patterns, great.  I’ll do what I do and see what I get accomplished.  I have no agenda and I’m ignoring my to do list.  At least as of right now.  I’ll have to see what mischief I get up to and what I get done without looking at my to do list.

Not Quite Done

by eileentroemel, posted in Life, Writing

Today is going to be a busy day.  I have homework to finish and need to help Vicki prep for Super Bowl food as we have Kelly and Dominic coming over to watch.  I also want to finish off my grant, work on crocheting, and a few other things. 

Yesterday was a bust.  I was in the middle of working on my grant when Ken said the tv channel he was watching went out.  This led to an all day affair with the cable / internet provider.  It eventually got fixed but it literally took until about 8:00 pm last night before we have tv services back.  I get glitches but I don’t get when they totally screw up.  I got the run around to begin with but had all the information and finally got someone who was willing to listen and work with me.  Now the service is correct – next I’ll just have to watch the billing to make sure they get that straight.  I’m sure my frustration and annoyance level will go through the roof as I try to get that fixed.

I did get some of the editing done on the grant but now I’m second guessing myself on what writing sample I should send in.  This is what my grant will be judged on for the most part so it is extremely important.  I want them to see my writing style and understand the story I’m trying to tell.  I also want it to be a well edited piece of writing.  Here is where the dilemma comes in – I have 25 pages which are well edited and start the story but aren’t the meat of the story (prologue and back story).  I have the beginning of the story which hasn’t been edited at all.  The prologue and back story has been edited by several people and I’ve had input from a variety of sources.  This means my edits have been thoughtful and constructive.  I’m not sure if I jump ahead if I have as good a quality of writing as the other part.  However, the beginning of the story is more action filled and jumps right in to the main characters and their quest but it isn’t edited.  I’ve had little feedback on it at all.  I’ve done little work on it myself as I’ve been working on editing the first part and writing at the tail end of the story.  I need to make the choice today especially if I’m going to start with the beginning because I will have to get the 25 pages I’m going to submit edited. 

This morning I was going to get up and work on my homework.  I’ve not touched it yet.  I’ve spent the last hour working on editing other people’s stuff and sorting through emails.  My last lab for this section is the next thing I’m going to work on and then I want to go back and review the ones where I got answers wrong.  The material is definitely getting more difficult and I need to have as many points as possible as I move forward.  Yes, I know two of my labs I only missed one and that is acceptable but I still am going to need the points.  Also, I have no idea at this point if I have homework for the other class as the professor has not posted anything and I wasn’t in class on Thursday.  This is particularly frustrating to me because I could have spent yesterday working on it but she hadn’t posted anything yet or answered my email.  I know my faculty told me to give her 48 hours (business hours) but at the same time it causes me stress because I can’t just stay home from work because she hands out a ton of homework.  Here is where I have to do what I can and let the rest go – obviously I’m working on that. 

I’m going to try to spend the next two hours very productively and then this afternoon I’ll be assistant chef to Vicki and have fun during the Super Bowl (who ever thought those words would come out of my mouth?)

My to-do lists got some attention but not enough…

Chaos / Clutter

by eileentroemel, posted in Life
My home office is a mess.  Actually that is putting it mildly.  I need a weekend to clean it and get it organized.  I don’t have the weekend to do that.  I also have the added issue of struggling to have my feet down and moving around.  My desk is piled high with paperwork, books, school stuff, writing stuff, and so on.  I also need to get the card table cleared off. 
There isn’t a lot that stresses me out about my environment.  I’m definitely not a neat freak but right now my messy office a big time stressor.  I’d like nothing better than to get in there and spend a day just organizing and cleaning it out.  My physical limitations are frustrating me on this one level. 
I can find things to do while I sit in the recliner with my foot up.  I can nap, crochet, read, and even do most of my homework from the recliner.  However, I don’t like paying bills from the recliner (like to have two monitors to flip between spreadsheet and internet as I’m paying bills).  I also need the space so I can spread out to do some of my other things like writing and even homework – it is just more convenient. 
Instead of fussing about it, I guess I’ll have to figure out a way to work on it bit by bit.  Perhaps if I put in an hour or two at a time every day, I’ll be able to get it cleared up in the next week or so.  I won’t start the new semester with a clean work space but I might have it clean in short order.

Mindlessness

by eileentroemel, posted in Uncategorized

I’ve discovered that I require a certain level of mindlessness.  It doesn’t matter if it is playing on Facebook or a computer game, watching mindless tv or whatever.  There are times when my brain says enough and I require a break.  It is probably because I don’t get enough sleep and it is shutting down to sleep (even when it won’t let me sleep). 

Last thing at night I am generally on my computer.  I either answer emails or playing games – usually games.  At the end of the day, I seem to need to have that blank mind and not think about anything more strenuous than which card plays or find the objects listed. 

I’d rather not have these moments of mindlessness but my brain seems to be requiring them.  The thing is I could easily sit at my computer and write during these times.  In fact when I do, I am often energized and lose track of time.  (This is probably why I need the mindlessness.)  However, at 11 pm I need to be going to bed not writing in my novel.  Unless of course, I don’t need to get up the next day – then it is all about the writing.

Day is Done… thankfully

by eileentroemel, posted in Uncategorized

Today has been a DAY and a half…

It really started last night.  The weather is getting ready to change.  I know – not because I watch the weather – because every joint in my body hurts.  When I finally got to bed, I couldn’t sleep.  It was a combination of too much pain and too much on my mind.

This morning I woke up from a fitful night’s sleep to have hands that wouldn’t close and pain everywhere.  Standing under the hot shower chased away some of the aches. 

Work was CRAZY.  I would start to work on something only to be interrupted by several things – urgent emails, phones ringing, students, faculty, other people, and all sorts of issues to resolve.

I’m only six months into my job so I’m still at the “I don’t know but I’ll find out” stage.  Most people are understanding but it means I have to figure out who to ask and then wait for them to answer.  I have to say though that I’ve been getting some wonderful support from those I ask.  People have just been super nice to me. 

On a side note – I found out yesterday that I am off probation and now considered a permanent employee!!!!  This is a relief in these difficult and uncertain times.  I feel slightly more secure about my job being there every day now.

By the time I left work, I was ready to come home and curl up.  Instead I’ve got a sick husband and daughter so I have to cook supper.  I looked at my refrigerator and freezer and said… hmmm hash.. I chopped up a half of an onion that was in my fridge, left over ham, and hashbrowns.  When it was done we topped it with some cheddar cheese and called it supper.

Finally I got to sit down to relax.  I’ve been a bum tonight.  Sat at my computer playing different word games I downloaded.  Some were fun, some not.  Overall, I’m glad today is done and I can go to bed soon…

Various information

by eileentroemel, posted in Uncategorized

I know that some of you are probably tired of the political stuff.  I know I’m stressed and tired of it.  It is hard for me to understand why someone or a group of someones would so completely ignore what is right and what a huge number of people want for their own state… but that is neither here nor there…

I’ve said all along I don’t trust Walker’s numbers.  I don’t trust that he is telling the truth.  Here is a link to an article I found to be very interesting.

On the topic of fiscal responsibility – perhaps EVERYONE should look at this graph – now it is for the national level but it speaks to which party is the more fiscally responsible…
I work at a state university.  The tension at work is palpable.  The anger, frustration, and disappointment hang in the air like cobwebs in a deserted house.  Worry is etched on every one’s face and determination to stand up to this situation is in the stance of nearly all the employees.
I hope that the Republicans and Walker see sense and stop tearing down Wisconsin.  If not I hope they are prepared to lose their jobs.  There is a rally tomorrow in Madison.  If you can, please go – voice your opinion – whatever it is. 
I drove around the capitol square today.  People crowded the sidewalks and near the building.  I saw a lot of people – no thugs, no violence, no disorderly conduct.  I saw people gathering to voice their opinions.  It made me proud.  Now if only there was someone there to listen.

Christmas…

by eileentroemel, posted in Uncategorized

Those who know me, know I don’t enjoy Christmas.  For others it is a great time of celebration and shopping.  For me it is stressful, loathsome, and difficult.  I always feel stressed out about being in such large groups – both shopping and at family gatherings.  I’d much rather meet one on one and have a quiet gathering than to have 20 – 30 people in a small space. 

Over the years I’ve learned to not shop after Thanksgiving.  The stores are crazed and people are insane.  When I go into the stores I feel a greediness so opposite of what the season is supposed to be about.  I watch the other shoppers rush around, grump at their kids, and be stressed out.  I think to myself – why are you doing this? 

Family gatherings are difficult.  It is always chaotic and loud.  There are always so many people around you can barely hear your own thoughts let alone conversation.  This year we went to Ken’s side and it was better.  I spoke with nieces and nephew who I enjoy and have something in common with.  I listened to stories from brothers-in-law.  We had conversations which were fairly pleasant.  I know Ken would have liked to stay longer but I’d had my fill of crowded loud gathering. 

We came home and I napped.  I think I just needed to gather some peaceful energy around me to recuperate from the overload. 

Today we go to my family gathering.  I’m trying to not get stressed out about the whole thing.  I would rather stay home in front of the fire and read all day but I won’t.  I’m sure it will be loud and stressful for me.  I’m hopeful that there will be some good quiet conversations while I’m there.  Only time will tell…